God Made a Linux for Us!

One of my faithful readers, dogeatery, has reported that Jesus delivered us “a family friendly operating system complete with web content filtering.” This is great! In Stalin’s day the communists would kill Christians and send their family off to Siberia, but now they’re making computer programs for us. It even comes with a bible Memorizer program.

Now I really don’t care about the computer nerdism. I’m just glad even the pot smoking commie geeks are starting to find Jesus. Maybe He’ll be able to improve there lives.

Another Christian LInix

It looks just like a real computer, but with a map of part of the Holy Land, where Jesus was born.

Linix for Christians

See? God is still with His people even in these modern times.

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18 Comments »

  1. 1
    chillinatthecabstand Says:

    “Pot smoking commie geeks…”

    See, shit like this is exactly why I used to think this blog was a joke.

  2. 2
    blendedworship Says:

    Name calling. Dude. Stop claiming to love Christ if you can’t love people. 1 John 4:7-8. Take this as brotherly advice, man.

  3. 3
    angryxtian Says:

    Jesus never told people to do drugs and be anti-social communists trying to destroy capitalism.

  4. 4
    Yeti Says:

    Perhaps he didn’t. But he told people like you to love them anyway.

  5. 5
    chillinatthecabstand Says:

    I hate to break it to you, Frank, but liberals aren’t potsmoking communist geeks. Sorry.

  6. 6
    angryxtian Says:

    Shows what you know crack head. Mariuuana is a hippy leftwinger radicalist drug of choise.

  7. 7
    chillinatthecabstand Says:

    Ha ha ha ha. Oh, man, when are you gonna give up that “crack head” bullshit?

  8. 8
    angryxtian Says:

    That’s a good qustion, Crack Head. When are you going to give up being a lier?

  9. 9
    chillinatthecabstand Says:

    I am still waiting on that response on my blog where you called me a liar for you to point out where I lied.

  10. 10
    tripy Says:

    “Jesus never told people to do drugs and be anti-social communists trying to destroy capitalism.”

    I searched, but found nothing on the new testament about communism or capitalism ?
    What sect are you part of, that I get some literature about it ?

  11. 11
    Dan Says:

    “Jesus never told people to do drugs and be anti-social communists trying to destroy capitalism.”

    No Jesus didn’t say anything (good at least) about doing drugs or being anti-social.

    However, I’m not sure what he’d think about capitalism. Acts 2:

    44 All the believers were together and had everything in common. 45 Selling their possessions and goods, they gave to anyone as he had need.

    They sold what they had and gave to the poor – not taking from the poor and pursuing personal gain and money. The early Christians were fairly left wing in their ideology IMO, although it was Christ-centered left wing beliefs. They lived communally sharing what they had with each other and the poor that they met and they cared for each other without asking for money.

    THIS IS NOT CAPITALISM.

    Does Christ not say give to the poor and help the needy? Where is that care in capitalism – capitalism is just about accumulating wealth and making YOURSELF wealthier.

  12. 12
    alexanderthegreatest Says:

    Are you drunk, Angry?

    I thought I was the most terrible speller in the world, but, because of that, I use spell check. It looks like you wrote a program to munge everything you’re writing. I mean, I honestly don’t know how your writing can be so terrible without putting a great deal of work into it.

    Onto the real point. Jesus turned water not into grape juice, but wine.

    Jesus told his followers that, if they would be perfect, they should sell what they have and give it to the poor. This is because Jesus is love, not the spiteful hate monger you seem to be. Jesus doesn’t hate communism, he hates people to suffer, and the poor tend to do that more than the rich because of the way capitalism transfers so much wealth from the poor to the rich that they wind up sleeping in the streets, with little food, no medical care, and the spite of all.

    I would say that following much of Jesus’s advice is a good thing for society even if Jesus wasn’t God’s son, even if he never existed. We’ll both agree that he is in fact divinity, but you, friend, are ignoring everything our lord set out for us.

  13. 13
    shidemn Says:

    Regarding your constant grammar errors, not trying to be a dick here, but i suggest you use a web browser like firefox or safari, because they both have in typing spell check which i use constantly, but beware firefox is linux lol

  14. 14
    chillinatthecabstand Says:

    Yes, Jesus’ teachings were pretty anti-capitalist, what with all that talk about sharing or renouncing property and helping the poor.

  15. 15
    angryxtian Says:

    JEsus isn’t a commie!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

  16. 16
    chillinatthecabstand Says:

    Let’s ask my buddy Dictionary.com to help us out with this one.

    Capitalism – an economic system in which investment in and ownership of the means of production, distribution, and exchange of wealth is made and maintained chiefly by private individuals or corporations, esp. as contrasted to cooperatively or state-owned means of wealth.

    Communism – a theory or system of social organization based on the holding of all property in common, actual ownership being ascribed to the community as a whole or to the state.

    Basically, in capitalism individuals own things to control their community, in communism the government does and no one owns anything.

    Now, Jesus told people to give up all of their possessions to follow him. One point communism. Jesus healed/helped people for free without wanting or accepting anything in return/as payment. One point communism. Jesus was killed by a theocracy/pseudo-communist state. One point capitalism. Jesus encouraged everyone to give everything they could afford to the Jewish establishment, which ruled as government where he lived. One point communism. Jesus ruined a whole mess of sales stands for being in a temple courtyard, thereby supporting the theocracy/communist state then in control and ruining many hard workers’ individually owned businesses. One point communism.

    That puts communism at 4, capitalism at 1.

    Well, I suppose the tall tale of Jesus’ life places him a bit before marijuana became popular, but who knows, he did drink a bit, and encouraged his followers to do the same.

    Sorry, but Jesus was red as a Nazi flag.

    PS How old are you, angry?

  17. 17
    chillinatthecabstand Says:

    By the way, I thought you said Linux was for potsmoking geeks – what gives with this post?

  18. […] But if you realy half to us linux for some wierd reason even though Macs dont get virueses to, use Christian linux! […]


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